Have you ever chastised yourself for wanting more for your career? Found yourself having that internal dialogue in which you tell yourself to stop being so ungrateful for what you have and trying to convince yourself that the job is a really good deal and to stop moaning? Is it a crime to want more for yourself in your career?
We are not breaking any law but are we being deviant in that we are not willing to put up with the status quo, have we been conditioned by society to accept the hand we are dealt and to think that it is greedy to want to do better for ourselves? In my eyes, the only crime we are committing is to ourselves and our loved ones if we continue to feel dissatisfied at work but do nothing about it.
Frustrated, angry, bored, discontented, unhappy, unfulfilled, misfits are all words clients have used to describe how they feel about their existing jobs. Imagine if you carry these feelings for the majority of your working day and perhaps beyond when you prepare for work or when you clock off. Now consider how these feelings are manifesting themselves how they are showing up in other parts of your life, such as your diet. As you reach for that chocolate bar or pour another glass of wine as you try to distance yourself from that hard day at work. Or the disruptions to your sleep as your mind wonders as you desperately try to think of your escape plan. Or the argument you had last night with your partner as you took your aggression from the day out on them. You see if we are not happy at work, then it is not only our careers that are impacted but also our health, our diet and our relationships. Now ask yourself is it a crime to want more from your career? If we are happier in ourselves we can be more available emotionally, mentally and physically to those we care about.
So maybe with this shift in thinking you can accept that actually it’s ok to want more for yourself and to do something about it, perhaps you feel hopeful for the future, your shoulders relax. But then the fears start to creep in as you start to contemplate taking a step outside your comfort zone. ‘What else could you do?.... Would you find something that you would enjoy more?....’Could you find something that would fit with your family routine?’……Would you be able to earn enough starting in a new career?’ And so for the moment that career move just seems unreachable and before you know it you are starting to convince yourself that you are actually ok where you are and that you really mustn’t grumble. The cycle continues once more.
These questions are normal, you are considering making some big changes and want to know that it’s all going to work out, but how do you get that clarity, how do you get comfortable with the uncomfortable, how do you make this career change seem achievable?
The first step in changing career is not to change a job but to change your mindset, to give yourself permission to take back control of your career, to give yourself permission to leave that well-paid job or that secure job for something else, to let go of the guilt. To open up your mind to the possibility that you are worth it and that it is possible to find something that is more aligned to the true you. Once you have your head in the right place then you can start to get into the detail.
To get honest with yourself and open your mindset consider these four questions:
- What are the fears that are getting in the way?
- What are the limiting beliefs I have about myself that are holding me back?
- What do I need to be able to let go off, to be able to forgive myself for?
- Is there still something that I am not admitting?
Before starting your career search you need to invest in yourself and get clear on what you want, what will hold your interest, what you will enjoy, what is aligned to who you are and what you stand for. We call this the what phase, what you need and want from a career move to fit you. Consider what:
- Skills do you enjoy using
- Career fields interest you
- People you enjoy working with
- The physical environment that enables you to thrive
- Financially what you need to earn
This becomes your career capture list and from here you can start to explore where these factors combine.
Taking action is how you will make this a reality, no one found their next move in their house! Consider this a fact-finding exercise, explore areas of interest, talking to people in industries that excite you, look for ways to experience what they do and get involved. As you gather more information, meet new people you will gain clarity, you see action brings clarity and this is how that career move will seem achievable and your confidence will grow.
Maybe this still seems too much for you, although you absolutely know this is what you want and what you deserve. If this is you, you may want to look at the use of a Career Coach to help you through the process, to hold your hand as you take the leap.
Imagine a life when you actually enjoyed your job (well 99% of the time), you knew that you were making a valued contribution, you felt energized, excited and alive. Life is short, make the most of your time.
Book a free call if you would like to understand how coaching works